Blotter

A,B,C,D,E,F,Geez

A North Augusta man was introduced to the Burke County Jail after police officers found him stumbling around his parked car in the middle of Liberty Street.

According to the report, officers noted a strong smell and asked Hugh Douglas Murray, 44, how much he'd had to drink - to which he answered, "a lot."

He also did poorly on his field sobriety test, reciting the alphabet as "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,S,I,T … and a bunch of all that stuff … and like that."

Officers then asked Murray to perform some simple balance tests but abruptly ended them for fear he'd fall down and hurt himself.

When placed under arrest, Murray reportedly became upset, telling police they couldn't touch him without the presence of an FBI agent. He also insisted that several dignitaries be called to the scene but was unable to provide any of their phone numbers.

After telling officers they'd best have other jobs lined up "when the dust settled," Murray was booked into jail on charges of public drunkenness and violation of the Georgia Open Container Law.

Re-possessed

A Waynesboro man reportedly went loco after the bank repossessed his Crown Vic while he was in jail.

According to a report filed at the Waynesboro Police Department, the car was towed after its driver was arrested at a roadblock.

After his release from jail, the man went to the wrecker service to get the car but was told it belonged to the bank.

Police were called after the man allegedly slashed the seats and stole the radio.

Head-startled

The Burke County Head Start staff got an unpleasant surprise last week.

Employees discovered that more than 55 windows were broken out by vandals.

Waynesboro Police officers noted that some windows were broken with rocks and others were shattered with some sort of blunt object.

Head Start officials estimated repairs would cost at least $3,000.

Cleaned out

Three Waynesboro girls were charged with burglary after "cleaning out" a trailer they pretended to be "cleaning up."

According to a report filed at the Waynesboro Police Department, the victim came home to find his home had been broken into and ransacked.

Neighbors reported seeing three girls inside who said they were cleaning up the place.

Police went to the girls' nearby residence and recovered a prom dress and costume jewelry - the only items the girls said they'd stolen.

After conferring with the victim, police returned and recovered a diamond ring and two watches.

The girls, who are nine, 11 and 13, are also charged with willfully obstructing or hindering a law enforcement officer.

A woman scorned

A Waynesboro man called police after escaping the fury of his ex-girlfriend.

The victim said he and his new girlfriend were picking up a bill of sale for a new car when his ex, 22-year-old Shonekeidra Bates, attacked him.

A bystander allegedly pulled her away while the couple got into their car and drove off.

The couple was slowing down to cross the railroad tracks on Eighth Street when Bates rammed their car from behind, then got out and smashed out the back glass with a tire tool, the report said.

The couple fled to a manufacturing plant on the bypass where they called police.

Bates was arrested for criminal trespass and battery under the Family Violence Act.